Vague Post and Cryptic Messages – Are you Guilty?

We all have seen them.That friend on facebook who will write the cryptic post or meme photo insinuating some profound knowledge of other peoples lives. Negative messages meant to hurt people without naming names.  Are you guilty? Who is it really hurting?

Your upset and post snide comments, never naming who you are talking about.  You got peoples attention and your friends say they agree or your right. They are agreeing to the post not what it is about. Then there is that one person who knows it’s about them that you are hurting. Wait! There are those 5 other people who think it is about them. You hurt them too. Then there are the ones who think you are a mean person, a negative person.

Is that the type of person you are? Is that what God wants you to be?

Go back to your last few days of social media. What type of things are you posting? Is it positive or negative? Does it reflect the person you want people to see you as? Are you being a good friend?

Trash talking online seems to become the norm. People hide behind a computer and think it is clever. Cryptic messages are the worst. People feel betrayed and hurt and, it is hard to not feel that way. The person may be going through something that reflects your comments and the only thing you accomplish is hurting people. Wouldn’t it be much easier to talk it out?

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Not physically, no. Emotionally the damage your words does on people can last a lifetime.  Either you will chose to have a legacy of positivity or the legacy or hate. That choice is something much more than a second of anger you posted when you were upset. Truth is most the time when we get mad about something it is easy to lash out. But, sometimes just talking to the person rationally can solve most of it.

Not only is it negative, It’s a cowardly act. How can that person defend themselves? You have already rallied your friends to support you and no one dare comment in fear they will be targeted. Now you have hurt someone and have troops to fight  your battle that don’t know the situation. IT may make you feel like you accomplished something. But, when God ask you why, what will you say?

Is that who you want to be? When faced with who you are, is that the type of person you wish for people to think of you as? Is that who you see in the mirror? The one who is a bully online, one who’s opinionated comments are hateful and mean? I for one don’t want people to see me in that sort of light. I would like to have people see me as the person I am, or try to be, a good hearted person.

Everyone has gossiped in their lives. It is wrong and often we feel bad after. The difference is when we speak we have less time to think about our words. Online we have time to contemplate it, type it, search for that perfect meme to get our point across. In that time we had the chance to realize what we are doing and cancel it. Now it is out for the world to see.

What would God say if he were to talk to us about those actions? I think he would want us to know this, He doesn’t want us to speak ill of each other online or in person. Even if the post doesn’t say who we are talking about. We are still spreading hate. Everyone gossips or says hurtful things our of frustration. Does it make it right? No.

In James 4:11 – Speak not evil one of another, brethren. He that speaketh evil of [his] brother, and judgeth his brother, speaketh evil of the law, and judgeth the law: but if thou judge the law, thou art not a doer of the law, but a judge.

After all gossiping and spreading hateful images to people is not who we should want to be. I personally get frustrated and speak out negative things. I feel bad of myself as soon as it leaves my lips. Everyone wants to be thought of as good person, an honest person, and trustworthy person. But, your words reflects your heart. Either you are remorseful of it or you are one whose heart is hardened. The only person it hurts on those post is ourselves.  How?  People see the negative in you. Sometimes peoples only real interaction with you may be online.  The impression you have given is one that you are are bully. Take a little time to reflect on what type of person you are portraying yourself to be.

Maybe you are mad, having a bad day, or just think you are being clever. Sometimes I have noticed people will not really know the person they are talking about but, everyone know who they are referring to.

I try not to post negative imagery on my social pages. In a way it is a reflection of us. I have started to post these things out of frustration. I quickly realized that I was not hurting the person, I was hurting myself. Holding on to hate that God tells us to let him take care of. I quickly delete those post before I post them. It only takes a second for people to see you as a mean person. Years to prove you are good.

Philippians 4:8 – Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things [are] honest, whatsoever things [are] just, whatsoever things [are] pure, whatsoever things [are] lovely, whatsoever things [are] of good report; if [there be] any virtue, and if [there be] any praise, think on these things.

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Giving without receiving…

Giving without receiving. That is what we are meant to do as Christians. To give to others without expecting a big return in the end. I have not wrote in the blog for a while. This has been something that has continually weighed on my mind as of late.

While reading post on Facebook today, I was surprised by reading two peoples post, in particular, that raised thoughts about giving. I had noticed that they often share about things they do for others or the community. After seeing this a lot it seemed to be more about attention seeking than anything else. I am not judging the intent. I do believe that they are doing it from the heart. But, more upsetting to me is the need of gratification and praise from others. It just seemed this way to me according to the description of the post and reply to comments. I see this pretty often. People eating up the praise they are given by their Facebook friends. It seems less genuine when you see people seeking praise.

I was reminded of something my mom told me once about giving and tithing. “You should not do things for people expecting to get something in return. You do it to honor God”

If it is a physical, financial, or an emotional gift we should be giving because it is want God has put us here to do. Not for recognition by others for the deeds we do. Giving is something I have always believed should not be done for praise from others.

The deeds I find most honorable are the ones where people are not sharing it on social sites or using it to get ahead in the community standing.

For example, A man gives a million dollars to a needy charity. He does not leave a name just the money. He never expects to get praise. He did it out of kindness and wants no one to know he did it. Only that God himself knows.

Another man does the same but, has the media at stand by when he hands over the check. He gloats over the praise and people reverie him for it. Both are doing it out of kindness. But, which one of the two men is being more like Jesus in his giving.

Mathew 6 tells us: “Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven.

2 “Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward.But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing,so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.

I gather from that scripture simply this,when applying it to today’s social media and the now generation. When you do something for an individual or your community, do it out of love. Do it for the good of man but, keep it off of social media. The only one who we should be seeking praise for our deeds is our Lord and Savior.

FBC anti-Bully event revealed BIG NEWS!

I want to thank everyone who came out last night to support the anti-bully event. We touched a lot of young lives and our speakers made a huge impact to the event. Thank you to Mayor Graham, The Mid America Science Park, John Jones Auto, and, especially Anita Walker of the SCEDC for all your help and sponsoring the event.

I would like a to give a special thank you to DJ Eric Montgomery, all the volunteers, IWX Wrestling and all the wrestlers who attended. Spider Murphy, Johnny & Sabrina Sixx, Overdrive, Big & Little County. (Sorry if I missed anyone) Thank you Johnny, Sabrina, Spider Murphy and our Pres Jasmine for sharing your bully stories with the kids. Your words made a huge impact on a lot of young lives.

On top of some videos about  bullying  the FBC Sorority preformed a small skit. We would like to thank our FBC mentor Synthia for teaching the dance and all your help with the event. You are wonderful and we all love you.

The official announcement was made last night of the new division of FBC (FBC Bros) will begin for boys ages 8-18. But that was just one of the big announcements…..

If you were not able to attend the event you missed the highlight of the evening. The event BIG surprise was from Wrestler Johnny Sixx. He announced on stage that everyone at last nights event will be receiving Free tickets to Blake Shelton with VIP backstage pass! The kids were stunned and still talking about it today. Thank you Johnny and Sabrina for your help at the event from the kids and myself.

FBC goes teal for Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month

This is a story on faith, courage, family, and Ovarian Cancer. From FBC founder Loretta K.

This is similar to the letter I had written for my brothers, family and friends just days after my mother lost her eight year long battle with Ovarian Cancer. What I learned from her in those few years will forever be a reminder to me about the power and love of God. ***

What can I say about my mom, Carolyn, that could ever express the joy my mother gave to her family and friends. Her humor, love of her children, and love of God was something that I only pray I can hold true in my own life. Everyone who knew her felt a strength and a joy you can‘t describe.

ImageIn 2002 my mom was diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer Stage 4. After a 15 hour surgery and three months in and out of ICU she returned home to begin her eight years of treatment.

In the years since, I have learned more about faith, hope, and sacrifice than ever I have known. Very rarely will you find someone who can find the positive in being diagnosed with an illness such as that.  Her faith in the Lord became a testimony for many who knew her. No matter how sick she was, she always saw the positive in every situation. She was more of a support for us than we tried so hard to be for her. Showing us that in every situation, a light can come from the darkness.  She truly knew what Gods grace and love can do.  She often would say while having treatment, “ Look at that poor person over there. You can feel sorry for yourself but, there is always someone who is far worse shape than you.”

Often, she was the one who was in the worst condition than most at the center. She never saw it that way.  Mom took each day and experience as a blessing for what she had. She always felt no matter how bad she was there was someone in worse condition that needed her prayers.

Even at her worst she never lost her faith. Never a wavering moment. She knew, without faltering, that her love of God and faith in Jesus Christ would outweigh any pain she may have endured on this earth. She always told me she knew where she was going and she had no need for worry.

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A true example of her nature, my mother became a test study for caner research from the very first day of receiving the news of having Ovarian Cancer. She quickly agreed to be part of research programs in hopes that doctors and students at U of L ,and beyond, could learn from her illness to help others with ovarian and other cancers in the future.

Before her passing, in 2010, I learned what legacy she left. The stories from doctors and nurses alike showed her sacrifices were not in vain. Books and classes were focused on her case and the extremity of her illness. They spoke often about her willingness and kindness to allow them to learn from her case. No matter how ill she was feeling she always invited students to look in her treatment process. I was honored to be blessed with a mother so giving. It is amazing to she someone still giving of themselves in time of struggle to help others. Regardless of our loss we know that others will benefit from her illness and possibly win the fight. If anything comes from her passing I hope people can learn look beyond their own misfortune. Give of yourself to others, as she so often did for everyone around her.  -Loretta K

FACTS ON OVARIAN CANCER

Ovarian cancer is diagnosed annually in nearly a quarter of a million women globally, and is responsible for 140,000 deaths each year. Statistics show that just 45% of women with ovarian cancer are likely to survive for five years compared to up to 89% of women with breast cancer.

Facts:
1. All women are at risk of ovarian cancer
2. Awareness of the early warning signs of the disease could save lives
3. Diagnosis at an early stage vastly improves a woman’s chance of survival
4. Ovarian cancer is often diagnosed at a late stage.
5. Cervical smear test (Pap test) Does not detect ovarian cancer.

In 2014 Fashioned by Christ and Loretta K Beauty Image consulting will be coming together to raise awareness for Ovarian Cancer with our Spring/Summer fashion show. Contact Loretta K on how you can help be part of this event. info@lorettakendall.com

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GO TEAL IN 2013

September is Ovarian Cancer Awareness month.

Shout it out awareness, because Ovarian Cancer…it whispers.

Have a passion for Teal fashion!

Image Consultant Loretta K shares some of her must haves for September.

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CLUE # 6. I hope that was inspiring. 🙂 So now back to the fun. Head to the web site where the best models around our posted. You don’t have to worry at this picnic. These bears don’t bite.

Beauty Tip of the Week – Makeup Brush Cleaning

To clean makeup brushes there are a few methods I use. For home use and salon.

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#1 Use a tablespoon of white vinegar in a cup of hot water, and a 20 minute soak, followed by a hot, then cold rinse and pat dry will do it. Disinfects, dissolves grease/makeup, leaves no film, and inexpensive. (Family Safe)

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#2 Liquid laundry detergent will leave your brushes soft and clean. But sometimes brushes will be come too soft so a little goes a long way. Fill the sink with water about half full. Add about a 1/3 cup of detergent. Let soak 20 minutes. Occasionally add a small cap of bleach to disinfect but do not leave brushes in the bleach water for more than a few minutes. Also rinse rinse rinse. (Family Safe)

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3) Baby wipes. In between washing use baby wipes to keep the brushes free of residue and oils from your skin. (Family Safe)

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4) Alcohol spray. Spray in between uses to kill surface bacteria. This is very important for those with acne. (Family Safe)

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5) Salon grade. Last but not least Barbacide. Barbacide can be found in beauty supply stores and can be used on hair and makeup brushes. Although be warned, it is very dangerous if not used properly. Also poisonous so do not use if you have children in your house hold. Read directions carefully on proper use of the product. Some people think the water has to be blue when using Barbacide. Not true. Barbacide is highly concentrated and must be diluted with water. After use soak in water and let dry. This product kills most germs and viruses.

Beauty Tip of the Week – Cheep Fashion DIY Odor Remover

ImageThis look familiar? Yep it’s a charcoal briquette.

My mom gave me this little tip years ago. Take an old pair of pantyhose and cut off the feet throw a few bricks in and tie up the end. Hang it onto a clothes hanger and hang in your closet to remove odor. You can also place a few broken pieces around your home, in shoes, and any area you need oder absorbed.

It not only absorbs odor. It also absorbs moister due to them being very porous.

NOTE: Do not use the quick start charcoal of course. The quick start fluid is flammable and can be harmful to children and animals.

FBC Anti-Bullying Workshop

We are working on plans for our first FBC workshop. This will be open to boys and girls 3rd – 12th grades. Parents are welcome to attend. The workshop is focused on the effects of bullying.

You can help! Volunteers and sponsors are needed. More details will be posted as they are available.